Hard Headed Humans

I thought it was just my human but now I think you all have thick heads.

A girl riding home on the train on Christmas Eve has a crow bar that is attached to the emergency window fall and hit her in the head. Does she scream? Cry? Ask for her lawyer?
No she says 'what was that'?
WHAT WAS THAT? A CROW-BAR! AND IT JUST HIT YOU IN THE HEAD!
"Like usual you did exaggerate the situation. I know the girl... she's so hard headed that the crow bar bounced off her and hit the couple behind her."
NO!

"Okay seriously, the crow bar did fall down but thankfully it only grazed her temple and it missed the couple in the seat behind her. I heard she did go to get a tetanus shot though."

You spoil all my stories...next I'll tell you about the lady with the thermal event- NO lie.

Everyday Pictures

Word of the Week

Arithmomania

Ooh, I know. Obsessed with arthritis.
"Not quite. It's the morbid impulse to count."
Hmm, I think you suffer from this.
"Really?"
You're always late, you eat things with old expiration dates and you consistently forget how old you are.
"That's anti-arithmomania."
Is that a word?
"Doubt it."

Name that Movie

Only four days left to guess this month's movie.

I saw something nasty in the woodshed.

Yeah but did it see you baby!

Name This Park

DriveBy Pictures

Ice and Snow
Sand
My human almost hitHouse my human likesHouse I like

A Kodak Plant
A house someone likes A quiet resting place
A place to overfeed ducks

Peabody into Lynn Massachusetts.

DriveBy Pictures

Driving around Salem, Massachusetts. Before a tiny storm.
"I won't take driving pictures while it's snowing."
Wow, I never expected you to be so sensible.
"We'll walk instead."
Nooo.
"One of my favorites"

Pizza Mania

What's your favorite type of pizza?
Lately, we've been eating a lot of onion, garlic and pineapple but I think that's because my human wanted to use them up before they went bad.
"Eggplant with ricotta...yum"
Ohh how bout peppers and onions, sweet and simple.
"Antchovy"
What?!

Word of the Week

Perseverance
This is what I and any who deal with my human need to have. Lots and lots of it, forbearance, moxie, call it what you will.
"I'd prefer a mute button for you. Perseverance, steady action towards a goal despite obstacles. Or annoyances. Like... you."

Snow Day (Monday)

FYI-

Do not EVER let my human borrow your car especially if you need it to get to work the next day.

"It was an accident."

With subzero ("16 degrees") conditions, ice-glazed snow and slushie sandals my human notices the car keys in the locked car when leaving work this morning. Happens to all you humans I've been told but let me show you how mine made this simple mistake worse, ten times over.

• CAB RIDE TO LOCKED CAR- $20
• PEOPLE FOUR HOURS LATE TO WORK- 2
• TRYING TO EXPLAIN HOW YOU GET LOCKED OUT OF 2 CARS IN ONE DAY- RIDICULOUS

Not only did my human get locked out of the car at work but locked the other car at home as well so instead of a simple car switch had to wait for the cab carrying the two car poolers and the extra sets of keys. Then had to wait almost two ("1.5") hours at the train station for a train to go the right way.
"Well at least I didn't have anything to do with that. I lost my debit card too if it makes you feel better."
Not really since now I have to wait two whole weeks ("10 days") till I can borrow it again.

Snow Day (Saturday)

Going to the mall is something my translator abhors on a normal day, add a snow storm and being five days before Christmas- a very bad combination.
"Horrendous."
At least you didn't have to drive.
"But I didn't expect walking around the mall either."
By the way you dressed I'd say that was obvious.
"What?"
Two words ho bo.

Snow Storm Day One

If you have been following this blog then my next statement will not shock you.

My human is crazy.

For others, I'm serious and you can believe a talking mutant ant. For real.

Many people in the US may have heard about some snow storms that are effecting well pretty much from coast to coast. Snow in New England, normal. Snow in Las Vegas and Houston, eh not so much.

Does this stop my human from behaving like a child who's never seen snow before? Of course not. Plans had to be changed all errands done before 3 o'clock so we could be home to enjoy the snow. In reality, errands were complete by noon and my human was a bundle of energy looking out the window, cleaning out the fridge (I had no idea that pizza dough could go bad :/) and the horrors doing laundry. We even made homemade pizza dough and obviously pizza.

I think I could live with a few more snow storms.

"Not if you had to shovel out afterwards. Here's a few snaps from today. Enjoy & stay warm where ever you may be. Hey rewind that!"

That's right the best part- I can watch movies ALL day and my human wont stop me.

Driving Etiquette 101

Here's a quote from a unself-described road rager:
Do not tail the car in front of you and do not fall to far back so others can cut you off.
"Eliza, I know you're not talking about me and 'unself' isn't a word. How about a eliza leigh described road rager?"
I like unself better.
"Whatever."

The funny part about this road rage expert (ooh I like even better) is they rarely ("Never") follow this tenet.

Let me ask you all this geometry question:
If four cars are in front of you and you DON'T tail will you make it through a red light that everyone else is stopped at?
"Eliza. The 'road-rager' was panicking thinking they were going to miss their train. If it made them feel better to yell at me for not tailing someone who couldn't go anywhere anyways- then that's their prerogative. Besides it was funny.
'Go faster I would have made it through the light.'
'But there's four people in front of us, you driving would have changed that?'
'Maybe.'

The Lesson here people is~
never listen to your passengers("unless one's not completely in the car")
let the panicked person drive ("if they crash it won't be your fault")

Winter Clothes

That's it?

"Well, one's for you and one is for the camera. I'm waiting for my lens cap and I don't want the lens to get messed up. Obviously."

Obviously, you're messed up.

"Hey I have socks on."

With sandals.

DriveBy Pictures

"Yesterday was gray, chilly, overcast & did I mention a gray day? Here's a few shots driving in the Salem/Peabody Mass area."
Human I think you should start getting a driver if you insist on taking pictures in the car. I don't mind road rage but it was almost as bad as someone talking on their cell phone, eating and driving at the same time.
"Hey it was your idea."
You're taking suggestions from a mutant ant that only you can hear?