Sunday, January 18, 2009

Driving Ettiquette 102- Blocking

"Remember you are not the only automaton driving a vehicle."
Ooh, I like that. Especially coming from you.
"Do you want to hear this or not?"
Continue.

As told by Humanoid Translator:

If you happen to notice you are guilty of one of the following driving behaviors don't beat yourself up, we all slip up from time to time. If, however, you do two or three of the following habitually, stay away from me. Don't be to shocked, either, if someone slashes your tires, keys your car or- well you get the picture.

Signs you are an inconsiderate driver:
  • You block people in their driveways.
  • You stop traffic to talk with your buddy going the other way.
  • You drive down the middle of two lanes.

Let's take a closer look shall we?

You block people in their driveways.
So you just jumped out of the car for a second right? Maybe to grab your mail or pick someone up. The minute you leave your car blocking a street or driveway you've become an automaton thinking you are the only driver in the world.
Do not do this.

You stop traffic to talk with your buddy going the other way.
Hello! If you need to say more than hi and wave when there are other drivers behind you... PULL OVER. If I wanted to know your dog had heartworms I'd follow you to the vet's office.
Do not get mad when I start talking too and ask what pill your dog is taking.

You drive down the middle of two lanes.
Maybe it's snowing and that's the only clear spot?
Otherwise, I'm assuming you are drunk, blind or sleeping all of which are cases like an automaton on crack and you shouldn't be driving.
Do not act all shocked when you wind up in a ditch or handcuffed in a cruiser.

If you aren't hospitalized or incarcerated from your last accident then please before it's too late realize that 'it's time for change'.

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Any more mutants out there...ants or otherwise?